Thursday, July 30, 2009

Rude Awakening #4 - Let's Not Get Crazy

The only time all this craziness ends is when you're dead, and that's not that attractive an option.

Wednesday, July 29, 2009

That's What I Said!

My new career strategy? Listen for jargon my boss uses and repeat it every other sentence!

Monday, July 27, 2009

Apprehensories - Are You Using That Outlet?

Power Hungry - For some people, fire hazards are the only hope for creative sparks.

Thursday, July 23, 2009

Rude Awakening #29 - Hello Vodka, It's Me FunnyEye

There's a fervent belief among city dwellers that having a martini 29 floors up makes everything ok.

Wednesday, July 22, 2009

White Board Wisdom - Maybe They're on Uranus? Huh huh huh...

If senior management isn't living in our world, does that mean they're on another planet?

Tuesday, July 21, 2009

Apprehensories - Funny, We Don't Appear to Measure Up

Metrics - We measure the good stuff and ignore the bad stuff.

Thursday, July 16, 2009

Rude Awakening #63 - Never In Blue Jeans

I'm not cool enough to do a big presentation in jeans.

Wednesday, July 15, 2009

Work Talk - I've Got a Slim Jim Body

I'm thinking about getting back in shape. Traveling last week, I visited the hotel's exercise see if they had a decent vending machine in there!

Monday, July 13, 2009

Apprehensories - What's that Snapping Sound?

Swamped - The sinking feeling when you complain about how much work you have, but know there's really no solid ground to stand on.

Thursday, July 9, 2009

Rude Awakening #1,000,000 - You Were Saying?

By the time somebody says, "Long story short," it's always too late.

Wednesday, July 8, 2009

Conference Talk - Relationship Problems 2.0

I had to break off my last relatiionship because of communication problems. My boyfriend wanted to talk on the phone instead of emailing!

Tuesday, July 7, 2009

White Board Wisdom - Brain Dump

Brain Dump - Where 52 year old guys go when they get laid off.

Monday, July 6, 2009

Apprehensories - Wow You Must Be Really Important!

Brand Dropping - Repeatedly mentioning the well-known brands you've consulted with in the past month.

Thursday, July 2, 2009

Rude Awakening #139 - GED: The Good Enough Degree

My high school dropout relative is following me on Twitter. Maybe now he can get a Twitter GED degree since term papers are only 140 characters long.

Wednesday, July 1, 2009

Apprehensories - PowerPoint

PowerPoint - When the CEO's glare and finger are both aimed in your direction.